my journal 3

I saw a documentary (in German - otherwise I'd look it up for you) about a guy who lives in Norway or Iceland or somewhere and just loves being cold. He is some kind of freak basically. They shut him in a freezer with the interviewer, wearing just underwear, and they played chess. After 40 mins the interviewer practically had hypothermia and couldn't think properly anymore, let alone talk. The guy then went swimming in the ice floes. He swam for half an hour and said he felt great when he got out. No shivering or anything. The only danger seemed to be polar bears or orcas. Obviously he never saw anyone else swimming. I'm not recommending it of course, just you reminded me of it.
 
Ah ah, pretty funny. I'll have to look it up sooner or later: things2do.

I guess I push my limits, too, like this guy, in a much more limited scale. Today I realized why I do it (for example tonight I was swimming till it was quite dark). I do it because that way, I am less afraid of the range of situations in between. If I can swim with big waves, and with cold water and with a dark sky, and while it is raining, then I will also be able to swim in all the other situations between the perfect weather and this crappy weather. I am expanding my range of acceptable situations.

What do the others do instead? They say "oh, it's cold...", "oh, it's too much waves"... always complaining and practically never find one good time to swim.

With my method instead, I test the extremes, find out how far I can push it, and relax and swim in all other situations.
 
Dude, I am back. For a weekly update.

The position trades got hit pretty badly this week. Corn lost big time, so did Silver and Gold. JPY and GBL did much better, thank god, and saved my ass. So to speak, because I did go down a few thousands on these position trades.

The systems, too, didn't do too well: made a few hundreds, but due to lack of margin, one trade didn't get made and I missed about 500 dollars of profit, so I ended up unprofitable for the week.

...

Other than the trading, I am about to embark on the usual... that I do every two years, swim around the island. It's going to be 7 kilometers. My aunt will follow me on a canoe. It will take me over 3 hours. I don't know why I do it any more. Maybe to get in shape or maybe to impress people. I think I do it to impress people, mostly, because I always make sure there's some witness, to tell others that I did what they'd never dream of doing. They call me crazy but they admire me. They don't even get into the water, because they say it's too cold, and what do I do? I blow them away by swimming for 3 hours and going all around the island. Too bad about that trade that I missed.

 
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Ok, since someone is showing interest in the subject, I will say that today I tried to go around the island, as planned, but it didn't work out entirely.

Here's the amount of swimming that I did:

island.jpg

So basically, I circumnavigated the island, but half way I swam and the other half I paddled. But it was raining, and my aunt almost died in the process. Also, everyone blamed me afterwards, including the lifeguards.

But they do it every year, so we're all used to it.

...

In the meanwhile, in the last 48 hours I've discovered the Decathlon store, which is a franchise, an international one, which sells very cheap but very efficient products, such as the best swimming goggles ever built, which I paid just 3 euros:
http://www.decathlon.it/occhialini-nuoto-uomo-x-base-nero-id_5998369.html

Nabaiji is the (Swedish) brand. They don't get water, no matter how long you swim, and they don't fog, which is even more important.

Goggles which cost me 20 euros may not get water, but they always get fog.

Yeah, I was pretty smart. I bought several pairs of these goggles, and gave one to the lifeguard, and one to my cousin, who's one of the bosses of the island.
 
travis said:
Ok, since someone is showing interest in the subject, I will say that today I tried to go around the island, as planned, but it didn't work out entirely.

Here's the amount of swimming that I did:

View attachment 166208

So basically, I circumnavigated the island, but half way I swam and the other half I paddled. But it was raining, and my aunt almost died in the process. Also, everyone blamed me afterwards, including the lifeguards.

But they do it every year, so we're all used to it.

...

In the meanwhile, in the last 48 hours I've discovered the Decathlon store, which is a franchise, an international one, which sells very cheap but very efficient products, such as the best swimming goggles ever built, which I paid just 3 euros:
http://www.decathlon.it/occhialini-nuoto-uomo-x-base-nero-id_5998369.html

Nabaiji is the (Swedish) brand. They don't get water, no matter how long you swim, and they don't fog, which is even more important.

Goggles which cost me 20 euros may not get water, but they always get fog.

Yeah, I was pretty smart. I bought several pairs of these goggles, and gave one to the lifeguard, and one to my cousin, who's one of the bosses of the island.
Click to expand...

Your annotated diagram of your swim is...how can i describe...inspired!

GTTY

P.s. - can u send me some goggles pls?
 
I'm going to order 4 on the basis of your recommendation, although I'm usually wary of buying cheap stuff. I can use them for trading once I've found a waterproof cover for my laptop. Actually that last bit's a joke, but I am going to buy some.
 
Yes, by all means, buy them. As I said, they're Swedish made. They're quite tight by default, so I am keeping the strap as loose as possible, although I don't have a big head.

The franchise chain store is Decathlon, which seems to have excellent cheap products, better than the expensive ones:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decathlon_Group
 
Vacation is coming to an end... just a few more days, unfortunately.

No regrets though, because I did everything I came here for. I spent time with my relatives, I swam, I walked, I ran, I slept.

I didn't drink beer nor ate unhealthy.

I didn't argue with my friends, because this time I didn't bring any, for the first time. Great choice.

The trading didn't go so well, but that's because gold and silver got hit pretty badly, by the cartel that manipulates prices.

I didn't care about getting tan, but I also got tan. Not important, though, and actually it is bad. It is fashionable all right, but it hurts your skin, and your body altogether. It makes you look healthier all right, and instead it hurts you.

I found the swimming goggles, the best ones ever made, I found the best tennis shoes ever made, which also are as cheap as the goggles (16 euros)... decathlon is an amazing chain store. I am going to buy everything they have.

So, I was saying, I didn't bring any friends.

At a point, this seemed about to change, because a former girlfriend and guest asked me if she could come, but it didn't work out, and i am glad it didn't, although I didn't tell her to not come, but instead told her that I would have paid for renting an extra house for a week.

Today I climbed/reached the highest peak on the island, which is just 127 meters, but it did take me the usual 90 minutes.

It seems easy, because the trail rises gradually, but once you're on top, you could easily fall off it, for 100 meters, to the bottom. So, it is safe to climb it, but it's not that safe once you're on top:

top.jpg

Kind of like your equity curve. It takes you years to get to the top, and then you could lose it very quickly unless you're investing a small fraction of your capital in every trade. This peak, you reach it with very small steps in 90 minutes, and then you could fall and die, if you are not careful once you reach it. Today, I realized that it would have taken me just 3 small steps to fall and die. It is more scary to think about it now, than what it looked like when I was up there. I spent 3 hours up there, with my binoculars. Waving at all those tourists 100 meters lower, just two of them waved back. I felt like I had accomplished something really good, and wanted to show off.

Now I can hear the waves.

Today we had 1.2 meters waves, with winds of over 100 kilometers per hour. I still went swimming. Three times.

What the lifeguard and these people will never understand is that if you only spend 2 weeks per year here, reaching this peak, or hearing the wind, the waves, the water on your face, the cold, being in the water alone, even shivering... it is all great fun and distraction after sitting at the office for 11 months.

The locals don't understand.
 
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My position trades are finally paying off.

Today I went to the peak again, and spent 4 hours there. My arm was hurting maybe from swimming or from kayaking, so I took a break, although I did go swimming briefly from 8 to 8.30 AM.

I listened to the radio today, so I wasn't as bored and I managed to stay on the peak for 4 hours during which no one else showed up. I felt like I owned the whole area.

I was singing, and dancing, on the top - but not on a dangerous spot. I found a safe spot where I could dance. Probably someone saw me with their binoculars. Maybe someone on the tug boat that's anchored in the underlying bay. They must have powerful binoculars.

As I was there, listening to the music and talking out loud, like The Fool On The Hill, I also thought and talked about the markets, about my positions, trying to sway them my way, from that powerful position of mine... I felt like I could rule the world:

166264d1379453179-my-journal-3-top.jpg



...He never listens to them
He knows that they're the fools
They don't like him

The fool on the hill
Sees the sun going down
And the eyes in his head
See the world spinning 'round.
Click to expand...

I might go up there tomorrow, for the third time. Maybe I'll bring someone else along.
 
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Yeah, today I went there again, to the highest peak of the island. I went with my aunt. It was worth it. I managed to learn a shortcut and now instead of an hour it can be finished in just 45 minutes, from my home to the peak.

But there's some bad news I'd like to talk about. Beside the fact that gold and silver took a beating again, and now my capital is 4000 dollars lower.

The bad news is that indeed this summer I did not bring my friends from high school and therefore I was more relaxed, didn't have to set things in order because of their being messy, didn't have to drink beer with them... many things were much better, yet something almost as bad happened: I made new friends.

To the point that they were expecting me at the beach (a few dozen meters from here) to discuss conspiracy theories, to go for a swim and today one of these guys from the beach even called me on the phone to tell me to hurry, that it was getting too cold to go for a swim... the same guy who ditched me at 10 am, because he had changed his mind and didn't want to go to the peak with me anymore. The same guy, ditching me in the morning, was giving me panic attacks because he was rushing me to go the beach and have a tiny swim with him (he swims for 3 meters and then he stops to talk with me, while swimming, on and on, endlessly).

Tomorrow I'll leave this place, but for the future I need to find new methods to be free and do what I want with my time:

1) I have to keep doing the right things I've been doing and not invite friends
2) I have to keep from making new friends, by being here incognito, without them knowing I am here
3) I must calm down and not always want to do something

This place has 27 people in the winter. It's like a family, or a little village where everyone knows you. Let's try not to make it a hellish experience. I am finding out more and more about the advantages of being in a place like Rome, where you can be by yourself for months if you want, because the neighbors don't make friends with you as much as it happens on the beach, where yesterday I was discussing conspiracy theories with the life guard, who's even more into them than I am, and with two other guys from other cities of Italy. It is a complicated situation. It's not as pleasant as I thought. I always find this out once I've ended my second week here - the locals start making me feel trapped and controlled.

It's not always the same local who bothers me - each time it is a different person and with a different behavior, but there's always some event that makes me want to leave, almost precisely after 2 weeks I've been here.

What I like about this place is solitude and silence. But after 2 weeks, the locals, like the fishes in the water, start getting closer and closer to you, and all the silence and solitude are gone.

I am tired of this affection and friendship. I am fed up with the locals. I am fed up with people. I don't want to avoided, but this is making me uneasy and uncomfortable. Maybe too much affection and appreciation can make you uncomfortable if you're not used to it. Yeah, something like that is going on in my mind. I am definitely not used to it.

At the office, in the hallway, I keep walking forward and look straight ahead in order to avoid saying stupid superficial things such as "how are you?" to each person I cross. Here it seems that I'm being forced in a similar situation, where everyone tells me something I don't want to hear, like today a lady told me that she's been hearing nice things about me from her son, who swims with me, and complimented me because "I am a beautiful boy". That's right. I wondered if I were ugly, if she would have told me "you should ashamed of being so ugly".

These people, by appreciating me, also force me to reciprocate their kindness and as a consequence I am trapped, in a close relationship not just with one person but with dozens of people, which is something that forces me to be superficial and smile all day long, which is something really disturbing to me, given that the state of mind that I believe we should have is one of despair and depression or seriousness at least.

I came here to be the fool on the hill, who spends time by himself and thinks deeply, and instead they're forcing me to be a fool in a crowd of fools. "They" meaning the locals, the relatives who live here, and also the folks who spend their summers at the beach.
 
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Travis, you should develop personality traits like Niki Lauda, then you'd have no problem.
 
Ok, I'll watch that movie, as your recommendation.

In the meanwhile, I got back to Rome, doesn't it suck.
 
After my Decathlon goggles and sneakers, I am alerting you as to another hell of a deal, Celestron SkyMaster 25x70 for less than 100 dollars:

 
I've been trying to organize a second trip to the island, with my friend of many years, the guy running my server. We've been working for over 10 years together. It all started with a game of risk, you know, the mission risk, the board game.

He's the only one, from the trading world, whom I didn't get into a huge fight with, huge enough to split.

So I guess that after ten years of putting up with me, he deserved an invitation to meet me. Yup, we've never met in person. The only thing is that I did it my way, once again, without thinking too much of the others. I have said "let's meet" and then "come to meet me", which is not too fair.

We'll see how it evolves. He may come this time, within a month, or he may come in a year or 8 months - because the island will be too cold after the end of November.

In the meanwhile, my position trades are doing... great, I'd say.

I tend to invite people to the island, rather than go to them, because I just know the island is so much better than where they live. Because I've been to many places, and nothing compares to my island.
 
Samba em Prelúdio

Singer and composer Carlos Lyra:
Baden was at Vinicius home when he presented "Samba em Prelúdio", a tune he had just composed. Vinicius heard and liked it so much that he said that the composition was from Chopin. Baden denied but Vinicius insisted. At the end, Vinicius called one of his sisters who knew classical music very well, asked Baden to play and made de questions: "Isn't this Chopin?" She says no, Chopin had never written that music. But Vinicius still unconvinced said, "Chopin didn't make it because he forgot it. This song belongs to him.
Click to expand...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baden_Powell_de_Aquino
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vinicius_de_Moraes

Eu sem você não tenho porquê
Porque sem você não sei nem chorar
Sou chama sem luz, jardim sem luar
Luar sem amor, amor sem se dar

Eu sem você sou só desamor
Um barco sem mar, um campo sem flor
Tristeza que vai, tristeza que vem
Sem você, meu amor, eu não sou ninguém


Ah, que saudade
Que vontade de ver renascer nossa vida
Volta, querida
Os meus braços precisam dos teus
Teus abraços precisam dos meus

Estou tão sozinho
Tenho os olhos cansados de olhar para o além
Vem ver a vida
Sem você, meu amor, eu não sou ninguém


Eu sem você não tenho porquê
Porque sem você não sei nem chorar
Sou chama sem luz, jardim sem luar
Luar sem amor, amor sem se dar

Eu sem você sou só desamor
Um barco sem mar, um campo sem flor
Tristeza que vai, tristeza que vem
Sem você, meu amor, eu não sou ninguém


Ah, que saudade
Que vontade de ver renascer nossa vida
Volta, querida
Os meus braços precisam dos teus
Teus abraços precisam dos meus

Estou tão sozinho
Tenho os olhos cansados de olhar para o além
Vem ver a vida
Sem você, meu amor, eu não sou ninguém
Sem você, meu amor, eu não sou ninguém

 
I was just now in the taxi... I mean a couple of hours ago. Well, I heard this song, found out what it was, and soon I realized I came across a pretty good group that I didn't know yet, Mostly Autumn:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mostly_Autumn
Mostly Autumn is a British band, producing music heavily influenced by classic 1970s rock. The group formed in 1996, and have built their reputation through constant touring,[1][2][3] never signing to a major label. The group's early influences were Genesis, Renaissance and Pink Floyd, and folk music. Later albums also included more contemporary influences.
Click to expand...

In the cab I heard this song:



Then I also found this one I like:


And I'll keep listening. I'll also send it to my cousin, who's an expert on music.
 
Ok, with my longtime internet friend, whom I've never met, we ruled out Rome and the island for now, so we'll probably meet in Amsterdam, where we'll do drugs for a week or so.

I am going to plan this right, starting from the hotel, down to the precise type of drugs we will be doing. We don't want to ruin our minds with unknown drugs.

We need to book a hotel with internet connection in the rooms near the Coffee Shops, of which I found an excellent map:
http://www.channels.nl/maps/gdmap_basis2.php?category_id=11&taal=

Then I need to get in touch with the best contact who makes Rick Simpson's Oil, which cures cancer. I am going to take it every day, given that Amsterdam is the only place where I can take it legally:


Oh man, I'm going, that's all it is to it, I'm ****in' going.
 
Adamus said:
Travis, you should develop personality traits like Niki Lauda, then you'd have no problem.
Click to expand...

Ok, I am watching it. Unfortunately the audio is so bad that I can't really understand what the actors are saying (and if to the audio quality you add lauda's accent, i understand nothing at all):
http://www.putlocker.ws/file/1A7C882426E55BD0#

Found the server from here:
http://vodly.to/watch-2741821-Rush

This is what it talks about, among other things:


I guess all traders can relate to these accidents that lauda and others experienced, except that we only risk our accounts getting hurt.
 
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