shadowninja
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Fair point. I couldn't bare to open his CV, mind. Being a perfectionist and having a background in design and publishing, I am sure reading it would have inspired me to kill myself.
spanish89...
- Thread starter trader_dante
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donaldduke
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KillPhil08
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It's funny how he decided to answer his own question...
shadowninja
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PLC, eh? I thought that was a legal status?
rathcoole_exile
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Sh*t. Ive just missed something which i gather was one of the best laughs
ever on this site. Was Spanish spinning some yarns on his CV.........
laughter ? there were floods of tears all round. the guy is a complete moron. he should be sectioned for his own good.
PitBull
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Couldn't resist, copied from my inbox.......
SPANISH89: ah
SPANISH89: what if they ask me about it though and wnat details??
arabianights: midnight, not a sound from the pavement, has the moon lost her mamories
SPANISH89: il look foolish then
Slev: yeah you wouldn't want to look foolish
wasp: damn you gbp
arabianights: spanish don't worry about looking foolish
arabianights: it will destory you
wasp: spanish? look foolish?
candles: you could never look foolish
SPANISH89: yea exactly. cos if they ask ;why did a charity shop need security consultant' il look like loser
candles: you could never be a loser
Masq: i love you candles
Masq: you could be one of the best traders
SPANISH89: i guess itwill be good tho cos atleats they will know their office will be safe tho if they hire me
candles: lol
Nic: spanish you can give them details if they ask
Slev: yeha, as would any nursery you apply for jobs at
Masq: would you trade bigger if you were given more money?
SPANISH89: altho i hope nothing bad does happen n someone breaks in to steal all the screens
candles: not sure....
Slev: ROFL he's not even got a job there yet, and already he's thinking of robbing the place
trendie: goodness sake, still this! S89, say you would do anything to scrimp together capital to trade. say, you love the markets so much you would stack shelves if you had to
Masq: how much you up today if you don't mind saying
candles: altohugh you'll be pleased to know that i trade at £1 per point a few times today
SPANISH89: what if they ask 'why did a chairty shop need security' tho what do i say??
Slev: Unbelievable
Masq: oh...a change from 10/20
Slev: this is absolutely flabulous
trendie: say you wanted money to trade
candles: only on trades that i really like, yes
SPANISH89: nah i wont rob it
arabianights: spanish I'll give you a tenner for every one of futex's screens
SPANISH89: i would have to defend it tho if robber sdid come
Masq: did it work out for you
arabianights: but you have a minimum of 50
Nic: i hope you get the job spanish
arabianights: hahaahahaha
candles: im up about £24 masq. £12 of that was a £1 per point trade
arabianights: I think they can look after themselve
SPANISH89: cos futex may hire me cos they would see i worked in security so would knwo i would provde protection
Slev: I was the security guard at a charity shop, let me trade your cash **** ME I AM CRYING
Slev: AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Slev: OOOOOOOOH
SPANISH89: but if robbers come i dont want to get involved
Slev: EEEEEEEE
arabianights: HAHAAHAHAAHA
candles: haha
arabianights: what kind of ****ing security is thaT?
Slev: STOP STOP
Slev: HAHAHA
Masq: nice candles - anything positive is always good i say
trendie: robbers! this is so trippy
SPANISH89: i dont wnat a job as a security guard tho :/
Phil: LOL
Slev: they could hire me to trade, as I work security...but to be honest if the place got robbed I wouldn't do anything... so basically I wouldn't do anything for you, ever, not even protect you from robbers who never came
SPANISH89: i doubt they will even get robbers there anyways so itl be ok
SPANISH89: nah il say i would protect them///
Slev: Spanish I wan tsomeone to invent a drug which is exactly like listening to you speak
Slev: please say that in your interview
SPANISH89: would if robbers come il sorta hide with dante
Slev: why should we hire you? Well if robbers came I'd protect you...although to be honest I wouldn't want to get involved
Slev: oh my god I might actually jizz
SPANISH89: but call the police from the hidng place
SPANISH89: ah
SPANISH89: what if they ask me about it though and wnat details??
arabianights: midnight, not a sound from the pavement, has the moon lost her mamories
SPANISH89: il look foolish then
Slev: yeah you wouldn't want to look foolish
wasp: damn you gbp
arabianights: spanish don't worry about looking foolish
arabianights: it will destory you
wasp: spanish? look foolish?
candles: you could never look foolish
SPANISH89: yea exactly. cos if they ask ;why did a charity shop need security consultant' il look like loser
candles: you could never be a loser
Masq: i love you candles
Masq: you could be one of the best traders
SPANISH89: i guess itwill be good tho cos atleats they will know their office will be safe tho if they hire me
candles: lol
Nic: spanish you can give them details if they ask
Slev: yeha, as would any nursery you apply for jobs at
Masq: would you trade bigger if you were given more money?
SPANISH89: altho i hope nothing bad does happen n someone breaks in to steal all the screens
candles: not sure....
Slev: ROFL he's not even got a job there yet, and already he's thinking of robbing the place
trendie: goodness sake, still this! S89, say you would do anything to scrimp together capital to trade. say, you love the markets so much you would stack shelves if you had to
Masq: how much you up today if you don't mind saying
candles: altohugh you'll be pleased to know that i trade at £1 per point a few times today
SPANISH89: what if they ask 'why did a chairty shop need security' tho what do i say??
Slev: Unbelievable
Masq: oh...a change from 10/20
Slev: this is absolutely flabulous
trendie: say you wanted money to trade
candles: only on trades that i really like, yes
SPANISH89: nah i wont rob it
arabianights: spanish I'll give you a tenner for every one of futex's screens
SPANISH89: i would have to defend it tho if robber sdid come
Masq: did it work out for you
arabianights: but you have a minimum of 50
Nic: i hope you get the job spanish
arabianights: hahaahahaha
candles: im up about £24 masq. £12 of that was a £1 per point trade
arabianights: I think they can look after themselve
SPANISH89: cos futex may hire me cos they would see i worked in security so would knwo i would provde protection
Slev: I was the security guard at a charity shop, let me trade your cash **** ME I AM CRYING
Slev: AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Slev: OOOOOOOOH
SPANISH89: but if robbers come i dont want to get involved
Slev: EEEEEEEE
arabianights: HAHAAHAHAAHA
candles: haha
arabianights: what kind of ****ing security is thaT?
Slev: STOP STOP
Slev: HAHAHA
Masq: nice candles - anything positive is always good i say
trendie: robbers! this is so trippy
SPANISH89: i dont wnat a job as a security guard tho :/
Phil: LOL
Slev: they could hire me to trade, as I work security...but to be honest if the place got robbed I wouldn't do anything... so basically I wouldn't do anything for you, ever, not even protect you from robbers who never came
SPANISH89: i doubt they will even get robbers there anyways so itl be ok
SPANISH89: nah il say i would protect them///
Slev: Spanish I wan tsomeone to invent a drug which is exactly like listening to you speak
Slev: please say that in your interview
SPANISH89: would if robbers come il sorta hide with dante
Slev: why should we hire you? Well if robbers came I'd protect you...although to be honest I wouldn't want to get involved
Slev: oh my god I might actually jizz
SPANISH89: but call the police from the hidng place
PitBull
Established member
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some more....LOL
SPANISH89: aloha can i show u my cv now??
SPANISH89: ive shorterned it to 3pages
Phil: send it to me on msn dude
Slev: mate, 2 sides of A4 tops
Phil: then i can upload it
doggy123: yeah, good book. seems a bit surreal in parts
Slev: no-one will even look at it otherwise
arabianights: no why should I complain?
arabianights: spanish get it into 2 pages honestly
doggy123: yep 2 pages.....otherwise the person looking at it gets bored
Slev: spanish you don't need to write complete sentences on a CV, it's not an essay people just want to be able to glance at it and see what you've done
SPANISH89: theres now ay i could get it down to 2pages though.... :/
Phil: spanish
Slev: Name/Details, Education, Work Experience, Extracurricular Activities, done
Phil: dont forgot to attach a page of you topless
Phil: no one will read it otherwise
SPANISH89: cos page 1 is my personal details n 1st job
Slev: mate your details should take up 3 lines
arabianights: spanish with the greatest deal of respect I've done a **** load more than you and I can get it to 2 page
Phil: preferably the one mrg edited
SPANISH89: page 2nd 3rd 4th job
genics: surely just your name alone will get you the interview they must have hard of u?
arabianights: just don't go into so much detail
Phil: lul
SPANISH89: and page 3 trading
SPANISH89: ive cut out the detail lol
Slev: you don't need to go into detail about the jobs spanish, to be honest they won't give a **** about anything not trading-related
doggy123: depends what jobs mate, ain't worth putting in a papre round
SPANISH89: like i took out the stuff about moving housing and furniture n stuff
candles: lol, why was that even in there?? furniture??
Phil: spanish are you adopted
SPANISH89: i jsut wnat them to take me seriously though as an exrienced trader, even though im younger than everyon else, i dont wnat to be judged on that
Slev: don't bother with any sort of entry-level job, other than two lines - the dates you were there, your title, and a one-sentence description
SPANISH89: nah why?#
Phil: just wondering
SPANISH89: actually i hoep i didnt put furniture in 2x :/
Slev: spanish it needs to be visually appealing
Slev: not as in, pictures and ****
Slev: but as in you don't want someone to be looking at huge chunks of text,
wasp: pretty pictures... watermarked!
Slev: they look at hundreds of CVs in a month,
Phil: don't forget to put dick size at the top too, and anal width
Slev: they don't want to read your life story
wasp: mention the rum
SPANISH89: nah i took both mentions of it out
Slev: your CV needs to be presented so that someone can get your gist in 15 seconds
genics: surely all u need 2 write is
genics: i am spanish89
genics: and thats it
Phil: LOL
SPANISH89: took the charts out too
wasp: I am spanish, I like rum
genics: u had charts on ur cv?
genics: KIK
Slev: I am spanish89, suck my balls
Masq: phil
SPANISH89: and the earnings estiamte n stuff
Phil: did you put on your your 1000 line chart?
genics: sorry that shuda been, LOL
wasp: you had charts in your CV?!
Masq: when you did VC what experience did you tell them you had?
Phil: i sent them an email
Phil: i just said 1-2 2-3 for all of the,
SPANISH89: yea i was trying to double up by getting them to maybe even invest in my company..
genics: lool
Slev: ROFL mate, no no no
Slev: please God
Phil: your scamming one?
Phil: or the exports
brutusdog: rofl
wasp: omfg
SPANISH89: so i drewup 2 charts, the operation cost of teh business(free) vs the current and potential profits over next few years
Slev: Apollo exports, mate no-one at Futex is going to give a flying **** about that, no offence
Slev: spanish, a CV is a CV
genics: this is ****ing classic
SPANISH89: and the other chart about market share of my company
genics: brightening up my hangover
wasp: EPIC!
Phil: LOL
Slev: spanish, please, stop
trendie: s89: first set of jobs; date-started, dete-ended, key skills acquired. eg, managed a team, etc,
SPANISH89: i took it out now tho
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint from x.x.x.185 joined the chat
wasp: PMSL
Phil: is your company on LSE?
genics: omg im laughing so bad
SPANISH89: it looks kinda empty now though :/
Slev: I would show you mine, but I wouldn't want you copying it
trendie: then your compnay; start-up capital. show what your turnover was, and profits. nothing more.
SPANISH89: why you laughng at a cv?? lol
Slev: no offence
SPANISH89: i did call myself a plc..
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: sup ppl
trendie: trading: focus onm your start-up capital. and how you built it up.
SPANISH89: but i removed that and just clal mysefl a corporation and holding company instead
trendie: 2 pages max. as everyone is telling you
wasp: simple nick you got there!
SPANISH89: theres now way i could cut it to 2pages tho mate
Phil: dont you have to do paper work, not just call yourself a plc ltd whatever
SPANISH89: honestly, even 3 was a nightmare
SPANISH89: even when i too out teh charts
Phil: spanish type it in size 6 writing
barjon: you gotta be pulling everyone's leg, spanish
Slev: spanish my CV is 2 spaced-out pages
Slev: of size 14
Masq: you're a plc lol
Slev: and I have a lot on there
SPANISH89: they may think its too small to see though if its size 6
SPANISH89: i was privare limited company
Masq: ar eyou registered with companies house?
SPANISH89: o i called it plc..
wasp: have you even googled basic CV templates?
genics: sounds like this cv is gona be a straight to shredder job
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: whats this man tryin to do? start a investment mangement comp?
Phil: pretty lucky ****
cb: back
SPANISH89: nah cos id have to pay tax then
Slev: you don't need to write paragraphs about your jobs mate, no-one at Futex gives a **** about the finer points of being a carpet salesman
brutusdog: lmfao
SPANISH89: i dont even pay vat
Phil: rofl
wasp: have you even googled basic CV templates?
SPANISH89: cos when i get stuff shipped form china we pass label it as a gift
barjon: write it on the back of your latest trading statement and put "see over" at rthe bottom
SPANISH89: so they dont put vat on it
SPANISH89: its a nice looking cv
Slev: rofl you do realise that starting a limited company is a little more complex than writing 'ltd' after your name
wasp: Change your name to delboy too
Slev: mate, what planed are you from, seriously
Phil: lo;
Slev: planet"
SPANISH89: i wrote that if they wnat tos ee 1month or many montsh statements they can see it too
SPANISH89: and i was gan attach my deposuts n withdrawls page though prinited out from my account
genics: spanish serisouly why would they give a flyng **** about ur business
SPANISH89: whats wrong with the cv??
genics: if ur asking THEM for a job
SPANISH89: they may have..
genics: think about it...................
trendie: put focus on your trading experience. reduce focus on the others. you're pitching your CV to a trading company.
wasp: probably berre if you scrap all of your CV and just tell them your name and give them your trading statements tbh
candles: lol
SPANISH89: cos it says on their website about entrpreneurs...
Slev: OK spanish, here is one bit of work experience from my CV
SPANISH89: so i thought i may as well get a quick pitch in. since if they saw teh chart and how much profit vs operating cost is they may be tempted
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: you have to pay for that course for entreprs u know boi
genics: scamming ***** on ebay isnt being an entropreneur
SPANISH89: no i meant they would be the entreprenurs...
Slev: hmm wont paste in for some reason
SPANISH89: by coming and investing in me
trendie: LOL genics
SPANISH89: since they are an investment house
SPANISH89: so i would just be another pie that they put their money in
Phil: what da **** foo', get ya act together bruv
Slev: OK, without the formatting;
SPANISH89: i did write about eby too
Slev: Edinburgh International Festival (EIF) Member of the Technical Department, who co-ordinate a number of different sub-departments involved in running the Festival shows. Dealt with the strict deadlines and logistics involved in putting on a high volume of performances in a short space of time
SPANISH89: but made it sound good n professional
Slev: that's it
arabianights: yeah don't say you're a scammer
Slev: no essay
arabianights: most employers won't liek that
genics: spannish they mean if u have sucsesull businesses etc you could have potential to become a trader
SPANISH89: cant name my company tho cos its copyright fraud i think
Phil: say your a scam artist
genics: not coz they wana invest in some ****
Slev: lol dave
wasp: roll up to the door, show 'em your statements, tell em your anme and do em a little dance... that'll do it
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: y dont u just **** all these arcades, and raise munnay, then sit in one yourself with ur partner? that way u r ur own boss
Phil: i just bit my lip in laughter you *******s
SPANISH89: raise money form where??
SPANISH89: how is a mans cv funny??
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: obvousily not from here boi
Slev: please don't tell me you wrote about your scamming company on your CV, as well as asking Futex, (WHO WOULD BE TRAINING YOU TO WORK FOR THEM 60 HOURS A WEEK) if you could have money for an exports business
Slev: I might have just crapped myself
genics: hahaha
SPANISH89: i was trying to get dnate to come in with me, but he said that he will wait outside for me instead.
wasp: fukken hilarious
brutusdog: why dont you put lock down engage on it
SPANISH89: you crapped your pants/?
genics: anyone else actually pissing themselves at there desk?
Slev: yeah and then ate it
wasp: yep!
Masq: bwahahaha
Masq: ****
Masq: i'm going to pass out
wasp: sing them a song!
SPANISH89: i was gna show them the menthod page..
SPANISH89: not my journal..
Slev: please don't
SPANISH89: but would try manouring down a consultant route
genics: spanish u think futex wont have seen all the anit spanish threads on t2w...
arabianights: well I'm close to it genics but not because of this
genics: and actually consider employing u
genics: lol
SPANISH89: i have calle dmyself consultant on my cv tho
Phil:OK
SPANISH89: aloha can i show u my cv now??
SPANISH89: ive shorterned it to 3pages
Phil: send it to me on msn dude
Slev: mate, 2 sides of A4 tops
Phil: then i can upload it
doggy123: yeah, good book. seems a bit surreal in parts
Slev: no-one will even look at it otherwise
arabianights: no why should I complain?
arabianights: spanish get it into 2 pages honestly
doggy123: yep 2 pages.....otherwise the person looking at it gets bored
Slev: spanish you don't need to write complete sentences on a CV, it's not an essay people just want to be able to glance at it and see what you've done
SPANISH89: theres now ay i could get it down to 2pages though.... :/
Phil: spanish
Slev: Name/Details, Education, Work Experience, Extracurricular Activities, done
Phil: dont forgot to attach a page of you topless
Phil: no one will read it otherwise
SPANISH89: cos page 1 is my personal details n 1st job
Slev: mate your details should take up 3 lines
arabianights: spanish with the greatest deal of respect I've done a **** load more than you and I can get it to 2 page
Phil: preferably the one mrg edited
SPANISH89: page 2nd 3rd 4th job
genics: surely just your name alone will get you the interview they must have hard of u?
arabianights: just don't go into so much detail
Phil: lul
SPANISH89: and page 3 trading
SPANISH89: ive cut out the detail lol
Slev: you don't need to go into detail about the jobs spanish, to be honest they won't give a **** about anything not trading-related
doggy123: depends what jobs mate, ain't worth putting in a papre round
SPANISH89: like i took out the stuff about moving housing and furniture n stuff
candles: lol, why was that even in there?? furniture??
Phil: spanish are you adopted
SPANISH89: i jsut wnat them to take me seriously though as an exrienced trader, even though im younger than everyon else, i dont wnat to be judged on that
Slev: don't bother with any sort of entry-level job, other than two lines - the dates you were there, your title, and a one-sentence description
SPANISH89: nah why?#
Phil: just wondering
SPANISH89: actually i hoep i didnt put furniture in 2x :/
Slev: spanish it needs to be visually appealing
Slev: not as in, pictures and ****
Slev: but as in you don't want someone to be looking at huge chunks of text,
wasp: pretty pictures... watermarked!
Slev: they look at hundreds of CVs in a month,
Phil: don't forget to put dick size at the top too, and anal width
Slev: they don't want to read your life story
wasp: mention the rum
SPANISH89: nah i took both mentions of it out
Slev: your CV needs to be presented so that someone can get your gist in 15 seconds
genics: surely all u need 2 write is
genics: i am spanish89
genics: and thats it
Phil: LOL
SPANISH89: took the charts out too
wasp: I am spanish, I like rum
genics: u had charts on ur cv?
genics: KIK
Slev: I am spanish89, suck my balls
Masq: phil
SPANISH89: and the earnings estiamte n stuff
Phil: did you put on your your 1000 line chart?
genics: sorry that shuda been, LOL
wasp: you had charts in your CV?!
Masq: when you did VC what experience did you tell them you had?
Phil: i sent them an email
Phil: i just said 1-2 2-3 for all of the,
SPANISH89: yea i was trying to double up by getting them to maybe even invest in my company..
genics: lool
Slev: ROFL mate, no no no
Slev: please God
Phil: your scamming one?
Phil: or the exports
brutusdog: rofl
wasp: omfg
SPANISH89: so i drewup 2 charts, the operation cost of teh business(free) vs the current and potential profits over next few years
Slev: Apollo exports, mate no-one at Futex is going to give a flying **** about that, no offence
Slev: spanish, a CV is a CV
genics: this is ****ing classic
SPANISH89: and the other chart about market share of my company
genics: brightening up my hangover
wasp: EPIC!
Phil: LOL
Slev: spanish, please, stop
trendie: s89: first set of jobs; date-started, dete-ended, key skills acquired. eg, managed a team, etc,
SPANISH89: i took it out now tho
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint from x.x.x.185 joined the chat
wasp: PMSL
Phil: is your company on LSE?
genics: omg im laughing so bad
SPANISH89: it looks kinda empty now though :/
Slev: I would show you mine, but I wouldn't want you copying it
trendie: then your compnay; start-up capital. show what your turnover was, and profits. nothing more.
SPANISH89: why you laughng at a cv?? lol
Slev: no offence
SPANISH89: i did call myself a plc..
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: sup ppl
trendie: trading: focus onm your start-up capital. and how you built it up.
SPANISH89: but i removed that and just clal mysefl a corporation and holding company instead
trendie: 2 pages max. as everyone is telling you
wasp: simple nick you got there!
SPANISH89: theres now way i could cut it to 2pages tho mate
Phil: dont you have to do paper work, not just call yourself a plc ltd whatever
SPANISH89: honestly, even 3 was a nightmare
SPANISH89: even when i too out teh charts
Phil: spanish type it in size 6 writing
barjon: you gotta be pulling everyone's leg, spanish
Slev: spanish my CV is 2 spaced-out pages
Slev: of size 14
Masq: you're a plc lol
Slev: and I have a lot on there
SPANISH89: they may think its too small to see though if its size 6
SPANISH89: i was privare limited company
Masq: ar eyou registered with companies house?
SPANISH89: o i called it plc..
wasp: have you even googled basic CV templates?
genics: sounds like this cv is gona be a straight to shredder job
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: whats this man tryin to do? start a investment mangement comp?
Phil: pretty lucky ****
cb: back
SPANISH89: nah cos id have to pay tax then
Slev: you don't need to write paragraphs about your jobs mate, no-one at Futex gives a **** about the finer points of being a carpet salesman
brutusdog: lmfao
SPANISH89: i dont even pay vat
Phil: rofl
wasp: have you even googled basic CV templates?
SPANISH89: cos when i get stuff shipped form china we pass label it as a gift
barjon: write it on the back of your latest trading statement and put "see over" at rthe bottom
SPANISH89: so they dont put vat on it
SPANISH89: its a nice looking cv
Slev: rofl you do realise that starting a limited company is a little more complex than writing 'ltd' after your name
wasp: Change your name to delboy too
Slev: mate, what planed are you from, seriously
Phil: lo;
Slev: planet"
SPANISH89: i wrote that if they wnat tos ee 1month or many montsh statements they can see it too
SPANISH89: and i was gan attach my deposuts n withdrawls page though prinited out from my account
genics: spanish serisouly why would they give a flyng **** about ur business
SPANISH89: whats wrong with the cv??
genics: if ur asking THEM for a job
SPANISH89: they may have..
genics: think about it...................
trendie: put focus on your trading experience. reduce focus on the others. you're pitching your CV to a trading company.
wasp: probably berre if you scrap all of your CV and just tell them your name and give them your trading statements tbh
candles: lol
SPANISH89: cos it says on their website about entrpreneurs...
Slev: OK spanish, here is one bit of work experience from my CV
SPANISH89: so i thought i may as well get a quick pitch in. since if they saw teh chart and how much profit vs operating cost is they may be tempted
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: you have to pay for that course for entreprs u know boi
genics: scamming ***** on ebay isnt being an entropreneur
SPANISH89: no i meant they would be the entreprenurs...
Slev: hmm wont paste in for some reason
SPANISH89: by coming and investing in me
trendie: LOL genics
SPANISH89: since they are an investment house
SPANISH89: so i would just be another pie that they put their money in
Phil: what da **** foo', get ya act together bruv
Slev: OK, without the formatting;
SPANISH89: i did write about eby too
Slev: Edinburgh International Festival (EIF) Member of the Technical Department, who co-ordinate a number of different sub-departments involved in running the Festival shows. Dealt with the strict deadlines and logistics involved in putting on a high volume of performances in a short space of time
SPANISH89: but made it sound good n professional
Slev: that's it
arabianights: yeah don't say you're a scammer
Slev: no essay
arabianights: most employers won't liek that
genics: spannish they mean if u have sucsesull businesses etc you could have potential to become a trader
SPANISH89: cant name my company tho cos its copyright fraud i think
Phil: say your a scam artist
genics: not coz they wana invest in some ****
Slev: lol dave
wasp: roll up to the door, show 'em your statements, tell em your anme and do em a little dance... that'll do it
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: y dont u just **** all these arcades, and raise munnay, then sit in one yourself with ur partner? that way u r ur own boss
Phil: i just bit my lip in laughter you *******s
SPANISH89: raise money form where??
SPANISH89: how is a mans cv funny??
4from skint 2 mint bk 2 skint: obvousily not from here boi
Slev: please don't tell me you wrote about your scamming company on your CV, as well as asking Futex, (WHO WOULD BE TRAINING YOU TO WORK FOR THEM 60 HOURS A WEEK) if you could have money for an exports business
Slev: I might have just crapped myself
genics: hahaha
SPANISH89: i was trying to get dnate to come in with me, but he said that he will wait outside for me instead.
wasp: fukken hilarious
brutusdog: why dont you put lock down engage on it
SPANISH89: you crapped your pants/?
genics: anyone else actually pissing themselves at there desk?
Slev: yeah and then ate it
wasp: yep!
Masq: bwahahaha
Masq: ****
Masq: i'm going to pass out
wasp: sing them a song!
SPANISH89: i was gna show them the menthod page..
SPANISH89: not my journal..
Slev: please don't
SPANISH89: but would try manouring down a consultant route
genics: spanish u think futex wont have seen all the anit spanish threads on t2w...
arabianights: well I'm close to it genics but not because of this
genics: and actually consider employing u
genics: lol
SPANISH89: i have calle dmyself consultant on my cv tho
Phil:OK
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PitBull
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SPANISH89: nah i wrote that i was teh sales consultant, then was promoted inmy 2nd year to floor mangager n security manager/consultant
Masq: oh, but you left that in
arabianights: I don't see it
Phil: nope
arabianights: that's better
genics: this just gets funnier and funnier spanish u live in a ****ing fanatasy world
arabianights: I don't see any use from leaving it in if it were ther
trendie: S89: what if theya sk for references?!
Slev: ROFL phil that's excellent
SPANISH89: the old couple in teh shop wil back me up
wasp: epic phil
arabianights: phil you've gotta link to spanish's CV though
SPANISH89: and i worked for my friends dad travel agency as a perosnla agnet
SPANISH89: agent
Phil: hahaha
SPANISH89: but the company then went bankrupt
Phil: yeah i know
SPANISH89: but thats good
candles: coincidence?
arabianights: it's good it went bankrupt?
SPANISH89: as now i can make my role there sound bigger an dthey cant disprove it
Phil: the old couple in the shop will back me up?
Masq: yeah, gone now- was there before
Slev: I have tears in my eyes
SPANISH89: yea the old couple who an the charity shop will say i was consultant
genics: i was ceo of exonmobile recently my mum will confirm this
SPANISH89: although tehy may have retired :/
Phil: you dont realise that this part is going on t2w too?
SPANISH89: you crying mate?? :/
brutusdog: wank bags
Slev: yes I'm crying, for the gene pool
brutusdog: pork flute
wasp: this is too classic to be lost!
SPANISH89: nooo oil crahsed more :'(
brutusdog: meat whistle
arabianights: spanish how quickly can you get to the city, if you can get here within 20 minutes I can show you market depth and ****?
brutusdog: banjo string
SPANISH89: i think i will use some synonmyms though to make m look smarter
candles: why didn't you lock and engage it?
SPANISH89: ok..
arabianights: the real name for the banjo string is frenulum
SPANISH89: i can get there in 55mins
Slev: synonyms my favourite flavour
arabianights: don't forget to tell them that frenulum is synonym for banjo string they'll be impressed
arabianights: too late
Phil: rofl candles
wasp: GJ looking to bounce and rise again me things (sorry for the trading related post!)
candles: womb ferrett
SPANISH89: i was going to but i didnt want to lose 20ticks if it wnet agaisnt me
brutusdog: Animal Sex Tube - animal sex,beastiality,animal porn,horse sex,dog sex,animal ****,horse ****,sex animal (Animal Sex Tube - animal sex,beastiality,animal porn,horse sex,dog sex,animal fuck,horse fuck,sex animal)
SPANISH89: how many words do you synonmy though??
SPANISH89: i was gna do every 6th
Slev: what does that EVEN MEAN
Phil: lulz
arabianights: HAHAHAHAHAA
SPANISH89: cos i did an essay for english at skl, an di found this site that changed every wrod to a sysnomy for you..
Slev: you are going to write two words next to each other than mean the same thing, to make it look fancy?!
genics: wonder fi the ***** at fitex will be laughing as hard as all of us during ur interview LOL
arabianights: I would love to invite myself along
SPANISH89: and it got an ok grade, but the teacher didnt understand a word of it even she said.
arabianights: spanish have you got an interview any time soon? you can attach yoruself to me and we'll pretend to be siamese twins
SPANISH89: nah instea od using words liek 'the'
Slev: During my time at this place of work employment I was given a number of roles responsibilities with which to demonstrate my skills abilities in a range of areas fields
SPANISH89: or 'it'
Phil: haaha
arabianights: can probably get a few other gys and we'll be triplets
SPANISH89: and all other small and big words that are basic il use synonyms
arabianights: no one is going to be impressed with that
new_trader from x.x.x.37 joined the chat
genics: u on any sort of medication spanish?
SPANISH89: nah why?
Slev: WHAT IS YOUR BRAIN MADE OF
SPANISH89: grrrr ****ing oil even lower!!
genics: i think u need 2 be lol
arabianights: cheese
wasp: I cant do this... I cannot trade aqnd read this at hte same time!
genics: lool
SPANISH89: ****ing thingm, gna clsoe my platform cos its dperessing me
SPANISH89: need to get back out of relaity
genics: have u had creutzfeldt-jakob disease before?
SPANISH89: i need to write my cover letter now though
Masq: oh, but you left that in
arabianights: I don't see it
Phil: nope
arabianights: that's better
genics: this just gets funnier and funnier spanish u live in a ****ing fanatasy world
arabianights: I don't see any use from leaving it in if it were ther
trendie: S89: what if theya sk for references?!
Slev: ROFL phil that's excellent
SPANISH89: the old couple in teh shop wil back me up
wasp: epic phil
arabianights: phil you've gotta link to spanish's CV though
SPANISH89: and i worked for my friends dad travel agency as a perosnla agnet
SPANISH89: agent
Phil: hahaha
SPANISH89: but the company then went bankrupt
Phil: yeah i know
SPANISH89: but thats good
candles: coincidence?
arabianights: it's good it went bankrupt?
SPANISH89: as now i can make my role there sound bigger an dthey cant disprove it
Phil: the old couple in the shop will back me up?
Masq: yeah, gone now- was there before
Slev: I have tears in my eyes
SPANISH89: yea the old couple who an the charity shop will say i was consultant
genics: i was ceo of exonmobile recently my mum will confirm this
SPANISH89: although tehy may have retired :/
Phil: you dont realise that this part is going on t2w too?
SPANISH89: you crying mate?? :/
brutusdog: wank bags
Slev: yes I'm crying, for the gene pool
brutusdog: pork flute
wasp: this is too classic to be lost!
SPANISH89: nooo oil crahsed more :'(
brutusdog: meat whistle
arabianights: spanish how quickly can you get to the city, if you can get here within 20 minutes I can show you market depth and ****?
brutusdog: banjo string
SPANISH89: i think i will use some synonmyms though to make m look smarter
candles: why didn't you lock and engage it?
SPANISH89: ok..
arabianights: the real name for the banjo string is frenulum
SPANISH89: i can get there in 55mins
Slev: synonyms my favourite flavour
arabianights: don't forget to tell them that frenulum is synonym for banjo string they'll be impressed
arabianights: too late
Phil: rofl candles
wasp: GJ looking to bounce and rise again me things (sorry for the trading related post!)
candles: womb ferrett
SPANISH89: i was going to but i didnt want to lose 20ticks if it wnet agaisnt me
brutusdog: Animal Sex Tube - animal sex,beastiality,animal porn,horse sex,dog sex,animal ****,horse ****,sex animal (Animal Sex Tube - animal sex,beastiality,animal porn,horse sex,dog sex,animal fuck,horse fuck,sex animal)
SPANISH89: how many words do you synonmy though??
SPANISH89: i was gna do every 6th
Slev: what does that EVEN MEAN
Phil: lulz
arabianights: HAHAHAHAHAA
SPANISH89: cos i did an essay for english at skl, an di found this site that changed every wrod to a sysnomy for you..
Slev: you are going to write two words next to each other than mean the same thing, to make it look fancy?!
genics: wonder fi the ***** at fitex will be laughing as hard as all of us during ur interview LOL
arabianights: I would love to invite myself along
SPANISH89: and it got an ok grade, but the teacher didnt understand a word of it even she said.
arabianights: spanish have you got an interview any time soon? you can attach yoruself to me and we'll pretend to be siamese twins
SPANISH89: nah instea od using words liek 'the'
Slev: During my time at this place of work employment I was given a number of roles responsibilities with which to demonstrate my skills abilities in a range of areas fields
SPANISH89: or 'it'
Phil: haaha
arabianights: can probably get a few other gys and we'll be triplets
SPANISH89: and all other small and big words that are basic il use synonyms
arabianights: no one is going to be impressed with that
new_trader from x.x.x.37 joined the chat
genics: u on any sort of medication spanish?
SPANISH89: nah why?
Slev: WHAT IS YOUR BRAIN MADE OF
SPANISH89: grrrr ****ing oil even lower!!
genics: i think u need 2 be lol
arabianights: cheese
wasp: I cant do this... I cannot trade aqnd read this at hte same time!
genics: lool
SPANISH89: ****ing thingm, gna clsoe my platform cos its dperessing me
SPANISH89: need to get back out of relaity
genics: have u had creutzfeldt-jakob disease before?
SPANISH89: i need to write my cover letter now though
Mr. Charts
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I thought S89 was boasting last time I looked a few weeks ago that he was a PCSO with the Met !
Mr. Charts
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Only he could ring himself up to come and rescue himself - his narcissism blooming again
Gumping
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bob: i would if i were you and put half the stuff from the cv in there instead in a few lines
bob: and maybe think about using bullet points in your cv when describing the skills gained in each of your jobs rather then sentences
Gumping: yeah dude - bullets are good
SPANISH89: ive used a few more bullet points..
SPANISH89: my cleaner looked at it an dcorrected a few things for me too
2be: Gold looks good for getting Long on the medium TF
Gumping: ur cleaner is looking at ur CV?
bob: lol your cleaner ?
SPANISH89: yh i showed her it earlier
SPANISH89: n she cirrected afew things for me
SPANISH89: cos i didnt write gcse/alevel/btec
bob: whens she applying to futex next week ?
SPANISH89: just wrote subject names without saying that level they were at
Masq: she's there
bob: and maybe think about using bullet points in your cv when describing the skills gained in each of your jobs rather then sentences
Gumping: yeah dude - bullets are good
SPANISH89: ive used a few more bullet points..
SPANISH89: my cleaner looked at it an dcorrected a few things for me too
2be: Gold looks good for getting Long on the medium TF
Gumping: ur cleaner is looking at ur CV?
bob: lol your cleaner ?
SPANISH89: yh i showed her it earlier
SPANISH89: n she cirrected afew things for me
SPANISH89: cos i didnt write gcse/alevel/btec
bob: whens she applying to futex next week ?
SPANISH89: just wrote subject names without saying that level they were at
Masq: she's there
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Mr. Charts
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She must be full time, cleaning up his mess.
Can't quote because the threads closed.
http://www.trade2win.com/boards/tra...ily-trading-journal-whooooo-5.html#post451206
http://www.trade2win.com/boards/tra...ily-trading-journal-whooooo-5.html#post451206
Oh my giddy aunt. Agre with Wasp - can't read this stuff and trade at the same time.....
So I stopped trading for a few mins
Unreal. Particularly amusing when poor old trendie keeps actually trying to make sensible comments about CV formatting and they just pass into thin air. Top effort though.
All I can think of when I try to imagine the interview is Spud on trainspotting interviewing for that sports centre job. "Other people's leisure......is ma pleasure".
what makes you think it was trendie?
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