Dominic
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Atilla, sometimes it offers such options that it's laughable! At one time I even made screenshots of them)
Best Thread Joke of the day
- Thread starter Airthrey Capital
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Atilla, sometimes it offers such options that it's laughable! At one time I even made screenshots of them)
Atilla
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An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake... He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a 'Billy-Club'. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy...
Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?" The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times..."
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a 'Billy-Club'. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy...
Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?" The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times..."
Nowler
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D
Dowser
sminicooper
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Headline from Today's Online Daily Express
"SHOCK WARNING: Sun will DESTROY life on Earth sooner than you think"
The actualité: THE Sun will boil Earth to a crisp within 3.5 billion years, scientists have warned .............
Plenty of time for my out of the money trades to mature then
"SHOCK WARNING: Sun will DESTROY life on Earth sooner than you think"
The actualité: THE Sun will boil Earth to a crisp within 3.5 billion years, scientists have warned .............
Plenty of time for my out of the money trades to mature then
Pat494
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No joke!
Grumpy Cat wins $710,000 payout in copyright lawsuit :cheesy:
It could only happen in la la land
Atilla
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An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees!
'What powerful rivers!
'What beautiful animals!
He said to himself.
Suddenly, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look . . . and saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could along the path.
He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing on him ....
He looked over his shoulder again,
and the bear was even closer ....
and then ..... He tripped and fell.
Rolling over to pick himself up, he found the bear was right on top of him .....
reaching towards him with its left paw ...
and raising the right paw to strike ...
At that instant the Atheist cried out,
'Oh my God!'
Time Stopped ...
The bear froze .....
The forest was silent ....
A bright light shone upon the man,
and a voice came out of the sky ...
"You deny my existence for all these years,
you teach others I don't exist
and even credit creation to cosmic accident ....
Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?"
"Am I to count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light ....
"It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now ...
but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"
... a pause ...
"Very well," said the voice ...
The light went out.
The sounds of the forest resumed ...
And the bear dropped his right arm ....
brought both paws together ....
bowed his head & spoke ...
"Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive… :-0:-0:-0
:cheesy:
'What majestic trees!
'What powerful rivers!
'What beautiful animals!
He said to himself.
Suddenly, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look . . . and saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could along the path.
He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing on him ....
He looked over his shoulder again,
and the bear was even closer ....
and then ..... He tripped and fell.
Rolling over to pick himself up, he found the bear was right on top of him .....
reaching towards him with its left paw ...
and raising the right paw to strike ...
At that instant the Atheist cried out,
'Oh my God!'
Time Stopped ...
The bear froze .....
The forest was silent ....
A bright light shone upon the man,
and a voice came out of the sky ...
"You deny my existence for all these years,
you teach others I don't exist
and even credit creation to cosmic accident ....
Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?"
"Am I to count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light ....
"It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now ...
but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"
... a pause ...
"Very well," said the voice ...
The light went out.
The sounds of the forest resumed ...
And the bear dropped his right arm ....
brought both paws together ....
bowed his head & spoke ...
"Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive… :-0:-0:-0
:cheesy:
sminicooper
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Great Bitcoin Offer
Got this in my email today - I wonder if I'm still in time? Sounds easier than trading
Got this in my email today - I wonder if I'm still in time? Sounds easier than trading
counter_violent
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"SHOCK WARNING: Sun will DESTROY life on Earth sooner than you think"
The actualité: THE Sun will boil Earth to a crisp within 3.5 billion years, scientists have warned .............
Plenty of time for my out of the money trades to mature then
We might even have a Brexit by then.
Atilla
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mpups
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Got this in my email today - I wonder if I'm still in time? Sounds easier than trading
View attachment 250254
Ludicrous fake-fest! Check out the video on the website http://thebitcoincode.com/ :cheesy:
here is the site is taken apart by someone on youtube:
