Best Thread Joke of the day

[SOCRATES]

LOL: "nonosecond" I think that you probably mean 'nanosecond' Albert !

Now you claim to have been able to recognise and identify the hidden image in a nanosecond ! Do you know what a nanosecond is ???

A nanosecond is one billionth of a second - that timeframe is less than a blink of an eye. You are therefore claiming that you were able to identify the hidden image in a timeframe that was less than a blink of an eye.

Now Albert you should remember that "there is a very fine line dividing sense from nonsense" and you've crossed it once again, you old fibber ! :cheesy:

You can therefore be assured that we will "carry on laughing" among ourselves for a very long time

No, I mean exactly what is posted, but it is not spelt that way for your benefit, only that you are not privy and therefore you are prevented from understanding any further how and why ### takes place.

You do not need to know what a nonosecond is.

Are you on a pink day or a blue day by the way ?

And clickety clack to you too.

 

[SOCRATES]

Another left-brain / right-brain challenge.

http://www.geocities.com/devil_worshipper2001/funny/illusion_colour.gif

Simple, we call this a divert.

A divert is a particularly pernicious example of misdirection.

The solution is to "observe away" and not "towards" the trap.

How is it done ?

Try ignoring the word itself and concentrate on the last letter instead.

You will have no difficulty naming the colour.

Similar traps are set to misdirect the public in the interpretation of price time and volume by the way. It is no wonder nearly everybody succeeds in becoming confused.

The effect is to cause endless closed loop arguments between posters more fit to be on this thread than any other.

And that, is really funny !

 

[kriesau]

No, I mean exactly what is posted, but it is not spelt that way for your benefit, only that you are not privy and therefore you are prevented from understanding any further how and why ### takes place.

You do not need to know what a nonosecond is.

Are you on a pink day or a blue day by the way ?

And clickety clack to you too.

LOL: - Poor old Albert - mad as the proverbial fruitcake !

 

[SOCRATES]

LOL: - Poor old Albert - mad as the proverbial fruitcake !

And you are very funny too, though you may not realise it, or even why.

 

[LevII]

Real Joke

A drunken man staggered into a Catholic church, sat down in the Confessional and said nothing. The priest waited and waited and waited. He coughed to attract the drunk man's attention, but still the man said nothing. The priest knocked on the wall three times in an attempt to
get the man to speak. Finally the drunk replied, ''No use knocking,' pal. There's no paper in here either."

 

[rog1111]

......and on the same note, by speed reading in this fashion, comprehension/retention is increased dramatically, due to different use of the brain. Maybe some clues for trading there.

rog1111

......then finally switched to looking at micro details in the same way that one would speed read a book (not actually "looking" at the individual words, but letting the brain "scan" them) and then bingo, obvious........rog1111

 

[SOCRATES]

......and on the same note, by speed reading in this fashion, comprehension/retention is increased dramatically, due to different use of the brain. Maybe some clues for trading there.

rog1111

No rog, not different use of the brain, but use of different parts of the brain. Clues only.

 

[kriesau]

And you are very funny too, though you may not realise it, or even why.

LOL:

Not really Albert - you're the big joke here and this board is truly the right place for you to post your nonsense and give everyone a really good laugh :cheesy:

 

[rog1111]

acknowledged

No rog, not different use of the brain, but use of different parts of the brain. Clues only.

 

[CJIA]

cool art

some cool art

 

[ale]

Nice stuff CJIA.
I have an interesting Word file of a real 3D pavement artist that I would like to post.
How do I insert / attach it?

 

[boy]

Nice stuff CJIA.
I have an interesting Word file of a real 3D pavement artist that I would like to post.
How do I insert / attach it?

When you make a post there is a button to 'manage attachments' , upload from there.

 

[ale]

Thanks Boy.
I didn't realise that you also need to go into 'Advanced'.

Have a look at this creative chap.
Ale

 

[boy]

Thanks Boy.
I didn't realise that you also need to go into 'Advanced'.

Have a look at this creative chap.
Ale

A very talented guy.

 

[boy]

Brain test

http://www.big-boys.com/articles/handeye.html

 

[Mr. Charts]

I've just been told a film called "The Blair Witch Project" is on the TV tonight.
I didn't realise someone had made a film about Cherie.

 

[boy]

I've just been told a film called "The Blair Witch Project" is on the TV tonight.
I didn't realise someone had made a film about Cherie.

OUCH!

 

[trendie]

Try the management Test. Oh, and the Mostril500 is quite funny.

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/hot/office-attachments/index.html

 

[kriesau]

The father of one of my boys !

A guy goes to the local Supermarket and while he is there he notices a beautiful blonde waving to him. A few moments later she walks towards him smiling and says
"Hi, how are you doing"

He is completely taken aback and just cannot think where and when he could have met her before.
He smiles back at her and replies
"Do you know me ?"

She responds
"I think that you are the father of one of my boys"

His mind goes into a spin and he thinks back to the only time that he was unfaithfull to his wife
"Oh my God" he replied "you're not that stripper that I laid on the table at my brothers stag night party a few years ago where all my friends were cheering while your sexy redhead friend wacked my bum with sticks of wet celery"

"No" she replied "I'm your sons English teacher !"

 

[boy]

A guy goes to the local Supermarket and while he is there he notices a beautiful blonde waving to him. A few moments later she walks towards him smiling and says
"Hi, how are you doing"

He is completely taken aback and just cannot think where and when he could have met her before.
He smiles back at her and replies
"Do you know me ?"

She responds
"I think that you are the father of one of my boys"

His mind goes into a spin and he thinks back to the only time that he was unfaithfull to his wife
"Oh my God" he replied "you're not that stripper that I laid on the table at my brothers stag night party a few years ago where all my friends were cheering while your sexy redhead friend wacked my bum with sticks of wet celery"

"No" she replied "I'm your sons English teacher !"