Best Thread Joke of the day
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Phylo
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A huge muscular man with a tiny head walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The Bartender hands him the beer and says, "You know, I'm not gay but I want to compliment you on your physique, it is really phenomenal! I have a question though, why is your head so small?"
The big guy nods slowly. He's obviously answered this question many times. "One day", he begins, "I was hunting when I got lost in the woods. I heard someone crying for help and finally realized that it was coming from a frog sitting next to the stream. So i picked up the frog and it said,
'Kiss me. Kiss me and I will turn into a genie and grant you 3 wishes.' So I looked around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog a kiss. POOF! The frog turned into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman. She said - 'You now have 3 wishes.'
I looked at my scrawny 60kg body and said, 'I want a body like Arnold Schwarzenegger.' She nodded, whispered a spell, and POOF! There I was, so huge that I ripped out of my clothes and was standing there naked! She asked,
'What will be your second wish?' I looked hungrily at her beautiful body and replied, 'I want to make sensuous love with you here by this stream.'
She nodded, laid down and beckoned me. We then made love for hours ! Later, as we lay there next to each other, sweating from our glorious lovemaking, she whispered into my ear, 'You know, you do have one more wish, what will it be?'
She was so beautiful and my new fantastic body was still aroused. I looked at her and replied, 'How 'bout a little head, to finish it off ?'
The Bartender hands him the beer and says, "You know, I'm not gay but I want to compliment you on your physique, it is really phenomenal! I have a question though, why is your head so small?"
The big guy nods slowly. He's obviously answered this question many times. "One day", he begins, "I was hunting when I got lost in the woods. I heard someone crying for help and finally realized that it was coming from a frog sitting next to the stream. So i picked up the frog and it said,
'Kiss me. Kiss me and I will turn into a genie and grant you 3 wishes.' So I looked around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog a kiss. POOF! The frog turned into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman. She said - 'You now have 3 wishes.'
I looked at my scrawny 60kg body and said, 'I want a body like Arnold Schwarzenegger.' She nodded, whispered a spell, and POOF! There I was, so huge that I ripped out of my clothes and was standing there naked! She asked,
'What will be your second wish?' I looked hungrily at her beautiful body and replied, 'I want to make sensuous love with you here by this stream.'
She nodded, laid down and beckoned me. We then made love for hours ! Later, as we lay there next to each other, sweating from our glorious lovemaking, she whispered into my ear, 'You know, you do have one more wish, what will it be?'
She was so beautiful and my new fantastic body was still aroused. I looked at her and replied, 'How 'bout a little head, to finish it off ?'
Phylo
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After a long night buying a foxy woman drinks, Joe took advantage by giving her a ride home. After the walk to the door, the woman asked Joe in for a nightcap... One thing led to another and before you know it, Joe was naked.
After making great love, Joe rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.
Unable to find it, Joe asked the girl if she had one at hand. "There might be some matches in the top drawer.", she said.
He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man.
Now Joe was curious and a bit alarmed, was there a husband who will come back?
"Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously. "No, silly." she replied, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all." she said, nibbling at his ear. "Well, who IS he then?" demanded Joe bewildered. "That's me before the operation." She whispered.
After making great love, Joe rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.
Unable to find it, Joe asked the girl if she had one at hand. "There might be some matches in the top drawer.", she said.
He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man.
Now Joe was curious and a bit alarmed, was there a husband who will come back?
"Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously. "No, silly." she replied, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all." she said, nibbling at his ear. "Well, who IS he then?" demanded Joe bewildered. "That's me before the operation." She whispered.
Phylo
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DPD's chatbot starts swearing and calls firm 'worst in the world'
The courier company says it had recently updated the chatbot functionality on its website to include ChatGPT-style software that allowed the bot to give more human-like replies to users.
