Best Thread Joke of the day
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Pat494
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Poor old Ronald Dump thought he was going crazy with all the criticism, so he signed in for an appointment with the psychiatrist.
Psychiatrist : Do any of your relatives suffer from mental illness ?
Ronald D. No, they seem to quite enjoy it.
Psychiatrist : Do any of your relatives suffer from mental illness ?
Ronald D. No, they seem to quite enjoy it.
Pat494
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Are you sitting comfortably children ?
Well in a windy and wet country in the far North there was a lake.
And in that lake lived a Salmon(d) and a wee Sturgeon. They fell in love
and produced a...........one eared rabbit called Ronald Dump.
That rabbit used to sit beside the road on his golf course, Yellen stuff to passing tourists.
Such as " may ye sassenachs catch the pox " and other pleasantries.
Well in a windy and wet country in the far North there was a lake.
And in that lake lived a Salmon(d) and a wee Sturgeon. They fell in love
and produced a...........one eared rabbit called Ronald Dump.
That rabbit used to sit beside the road on his golf course, Yellen stuff to passing tourists.
Such as " may ye sassenachs catch the pox " and other pleasantries.
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Atilla
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This looks good. My kinda movie
Despicable Movie 3
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3469046/videoplayer/vi3847599641?ref_=tt_ov_vi
Despicable Movie 3
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3469046/videoplayer/vi3847599641?ref_=tt_ov_vi
Pat494
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One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you, I’m doing community service this week.’
The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.
Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you , I’m doing community service this week.’ The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.
Then a politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The politician was very happy and left the shop.
The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.
REMEMBER: POLITICIANS AND NAPPIES SHOULD BE CHANGED OFTEN AND FOR THE SAME REASON.
The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.
Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you , I’m doing community service this week.’ The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.
Then a politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The politician was very happy and left the shop.
The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.
REMEMBER: POLITICIANS AND NAPPIES SHOULD BE CHANGED OFTEN AND FOR THE SAME REASON.
Atilla
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Pat494
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If the notice had said please play on the pipe - none of the children would.
Oh well - thins out the dopey fringe I suppose.
Pat494
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A lady approaches her priest and tells him 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.'
"What do they say?' the priest inquired.
"They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?''
"That's terrible!' the priest exclaimed, 'but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn the joys of praise and worship.'
"Thank you!' the woman responded.
The next day the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding their rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots and the female parrots say 'Hi we're prostitutes, want to have some fun?'
One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Well, finally... our prayers have been answered!"
"What do they say?' the priest inquired.
"They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?''
"That's terrible!' the priest exclaimed, 'but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn the joys of praise and worship.'
"Thank you!' the woman responded.
The next day the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding their rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots and the female parrots say 'Hi we're prostitutes, want to have some fun?'
One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Well, finally... our prayers have been answered!"
foroom lluzers
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foroom lluzers
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foroom lluzers
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