How to get a job being trained by then working for a trading firm???

[grantx]

Belflan,

I can't decide between black op's in the fish department or counter-insurgency in stationery. Security is a joke - you can't carry a gun. What about you?

Grant.

 

[shadowninja]

I would avoid working in the sanitary towel department. The perpetrators of shoplifting in this section of the shop are a real handful and can often be very violent.

 

[belflan]

Belflan,

I can't decide between black op's in the fish department or counter-insurgency in stationery. Security is a joke - you can't carry a gun. What about you?

Grant.

collecting trollies me thinks (little to no responibilty, get to drive one of those little carts too, win/win!)

 

[grantx]

Belflan,

There's a three-year waiting list for trollies. Also, you have to do three years collecting on foot and study two years for the theoretical exams, plus a one-year physical training preparation before you qualify for the carts. The failure rate is about 98%. These guys are the elite. This is obvious by the way they stand in isolated groups, smoking, spitting, swearing, tatoos and all the women hanging around them.

Grant.

 

[belflan]

Belflan,

There's a three-year waiting list for trollies. Also, you have to do three years collecting on foot and study two years for the theoretical exams, plus a one-year physical training preparation before you qualify for the carts. The failure rate is about 98%. These guys are the elite. This is obvious by the way they stand in isolated groups, smoking, spitting, swearing, tatoos and all the women hanging around them.

Grant.

Grant,

Ahaaa, I see were this is going; this thread is simply not big enough. I need a separate forum (push2win perhaps?), were I can challenge other members to ‘virtual’ push offs the winner (me obviously) can then go on to make claims about their pushing techniques / systems, in the hope that some day they will be head hunted directly from the forum to go work for Tesco, Kensington, London (the Goldman Sachs of the trolly pushing world.)

“Failure rate 98%” in deed, ha, I’ll show’hum, I can spitt, swear, smoke, with the best of’lum

______________

slow work day
cheers

 

[davidnmfarrell]

Spanish... you don't want to work long hours but you want to work for a trading firm?

Tienes que ser trabajador tio!

 

[grantx]

Belflan,

It's rare but not unknown, for the exceptional to be recruited by the competitors, especially the Germans and Italians to compete in the international T1 teams (Trolley 1). Their hight-tech design departments each have around 20 IT computer design bods - mathemamaticians, physicists, etc. Real state of the art. The drivers make a fortune. Have you seen the latest Tag Hauer watch ad's featuring the German team T1 champion? He started in Tesco's, Stockport.

Grant.

 

[belflan]

Belflan,

It's rare but not unknown, for the exceptional to be recruited by the competitors, especially the Germans and Italians to compete in the international T1 teams (Trolley 1). Their hight-tech design departments each have around 20 IT computer design bods - mathemamaticians, physicists, etc. Real state of the art. The drivers make a fortune. Have you seen the latest Tag Hauer watch ad's featuring the German team T1 champion? He started in Tesco's, Stockport.

Grant.

i read this with a tear in my eye,

everyone on this site, to a man, can take heart in this story

live the dream people, live the dream

 

[belflan]

Grant,

Ahaaa, I see were this is going; this thread is simply not big enough. I need a separate forum (push2win perhaps?), were I can challenge other members to ‘virtual’ push offs the winner (me obviously) can then go on to make claims about their pushing techniques / systems, in the hope that some day they will be head hunted directly from the forum to go work for Tesco, Kensington, London (the Goldman Sachs of the trolly pushing world.)

“Failure rate 98%” in deed, ha, I’ll show’hum, I can spitt, swear, smoke, with the best of’lum

______________

slow work day
cheers

feast your eyes lads, feast your eyes

 

[Devilicus]

that's trolly pornography right there!

God i hope nobody walk into my office at this very moment...

 

[arabianights]

Don't take this the wrong way, but there are probably female lesbian one legged dyslexic dwarf welsh lib dem primary school librarians with better senses of humour.

 

[spanish89]

Belflan,

There's a three-year waiting list for trollies. Also, you have to do three years collecting on foot and study two years for the theoretical exams, plus a one-year physical training preparation before you qualify for the carts. The failure rate is about 98%. These guys are the elite. This is obvious by the way they stand in isolated groups, smoking, spitting, swearing, tatoos and all the women hanging around them.

Grant.

 

[belflan]

Don't take this the wrong way, but there are probably female lesbian one legged dyslexic dwarf welsh lib dem primary school librarians with better senses of humour.

agreed, no offence taken

 

[grantx]

Arabian,

That's easy for you to say.

Belflan,

I've seen the Hyper 225, a real trolley bay-babe magnet - better than the Mercedes SL 550.

New features:

expanded brake ducts to cope with sudden turns

the back tapers slightly to compensate negative air flow but to overcome excess heat (which could be problematic re spring rate and rebound) a damper vent has been added

suspension via wing-shaped suspension wishbones

lower front profile with additional bridge profile.

I could go but don’t want to sound like an anorak.

We can only dream.

Grant.

 

[belflan]

who's been doing their homework? (insert slightly creepy nod)

nice one, grant, respect

 

[Atilla]

Arabian,

That's easy for you to say.

Belflan,

I've seen the Hyper 225, a real trolley bay-babe magnet - better than the Mercedes SL 550.

New features:

expanded brake ducts to cope with sudden turns

the back tapers slightly to compensate negative air flow but to overcome excess heat (which could be problematic re spring rate and rebound) a damper vent has been added

suspension via wing-shaped suspension wishbones

lower front profile with additional bridge profile.

I could go but don’t want to sound like an anorak.

We can only dream.

Grant.

I like to dream about a trolley that can find it's way back to the trolley park without bumping into other cars and pedestrians.

You'd think in our modern day, we can send remote space crafts to the stars but can't get a trolley to move back to the place it belongs? How embarrasing is that for man kind?

 

[belflan]

I like to see a trolley that can find it's way back to the trolley park without bumping into other cars and pedestrians.

You'd think in our modern day, we can send remote space crafts to the stars but can't get a trolley to move back to the place it belongs? How embarrasing is that for man kind?

it's a good point, well made.

when tesco's get it wrong (more professional trolley pushers NOW!)

Printer Friendly Format - York Press

 

[grantx]

Atilla,

"without bumping into other cars and pedestrians" That's amateurs for you, isn't it? The real pro's don't have these problems. Further, trolleys, not only being symptomatic of man's creative genius, are a concomitant feature of a democracy. How many pictures have you seen of a Bolshevik with a trolley?

Grant.

 

[rathcoole_exile]

but I believe the Menshevicks did experiment with them for a while before the Purges .....

 

[grantx]

RC,

Good to see back.

Which was a major factor in the split with the Bolsheviks in 1904. We know all too well what followed - slaughter, starvation. I'll look further into this.

Grant.