ok i think i got things confused
writing an option is different from selling a call or put right?
Yes writing an option is the creation of an options contract usually by a trader that owns stock he is writing the option against. Buying (opening) and selling (closing) a call or put does not require ownership of the underlying.
what i meant is if i sell a call and it goes agains me if i choose i can exit the call at what ever the current price of the call?
The call doesn't go against you, the stock the call is written against, goes against you. When you "close" the call you have no more responsibility for it. Only the writer of an option is obliged. You would not be the "writer", you are the "holder". The holder is not liable or obliged for any risk other than what he opened the option for.
You have to have a plan. What is the minimum profit you are willing to close at. What is the maximum loss you are willing to close at. And when do you want to dump and close at what ever market price there is. An option exploits the direction of the market for the underlying. I use models that tell me what the option will be worth at various stock prices, and at various times before it expires. I then pick a "peg", or stock price to close at for those 3 sell to close conditions: close at a profit, close at a loss, close at market by a certain date. There is an example here of what forward implied spot price models look like
here about halfway down the page.
The option is not going against you. The stock that underlies the "call" is going against you!
and by exiting a call i sold, it basicaly means bying a call at the same price to neutralise the position correct?
I don't know what you mean by neutralize. What it means is that you offered the option back to the market, and you "ask" the market to buy it from you. The market will counter your "ask" by offering a "bid" for your option. Should you accept the bid, you are essentially cashing out (closing) of the option and converting it back to cash. You can buy another option with the cash. When you close, the price you closed at is shown as the "last" quote on the market ticker.
You maybe talking about covered spreads. Start simple. Just do affordable buy and hold trades. Research the stock. Make a determination about what direction you think the stock will go. Then open the option. I bet on cheap call strikes where the contract cost is under a 100 USD. If the stock goes up I make money - if the stock goes down, I close at a predetermined "peg" to minimize losses. I dump, at market, around halfway between the date I opened and the date the option expires. My maximum risk is never more than what I opened (purchased) the option for.
The internet is full of information. Investopedia has some good stuff. T2W has some good info. Learn as much as you can.
That page I linked to above has a free download that reads market chains (chains are all the options being traded for a particular stick). The chains are close to the market tick and indicate the "ask", "bid" and "last" quote for both legs (the call and put) of the straddle (the strike and expiration). So, when you download a chain and look at what the stock and option is trading for, and then download the chain again a few minutes later, you can get a pretty good idea of how the market works.
The free software also has a portfolio that you can send options to, and a "mark to market" feature that will give you a P/L (profit or loss) on the exercise value and the closing value of your held "test" options. You can use that feature to create a test portfolio (and not have to buy an option) to see how well your hunches worked out. Don't invest yet. Simulate a trade and learn how everything works before you risk any money.
You also would need a broker or brokerage account. A lot of your cost will be brokerage fees and commissions. Read the fine print and ask other traders what they think. I like contingency trades because they don't require live data, they can be pegged to the value of the underlying (stock) which, depending on the broker, can better assure order execution than a trade pegged to the market for the option.