What others think

[Jdesey]

I have been a student and participant in the market for a very very long time. I bought my first stock when I was 13 years old and I'm now 50. I have blown up a couple of accounts trading the Mini S&p as that seems to be normal for most. I have been in simulation mode now for over six months and I'm doing well. I have fixed my errors of the past by using bracket orders 100 percent of the time. This ensures that my stop and exit are preset and are actual limit orders placed when I take a trade.

Ok great. My denima is what those closest to me will say when I go live again. Granted they know almost nothing about how trading works, but I value their support and they care about me.

Who else has dealt with this? Any advice?

 

[timsk]

. . .My denima is what those closest to me will say when I go live again. Granted they know almost nothing about how trading works, but I value their support and they care about me.

Who else has dealt with this? Any advice?

Hi Jdesey,

The issue you raise does crop up from time to time - but it's usually by novices new to the game - rather than by an old hand like yourself. The point being that I would have thought you would have addressed this problem (if it is a problem) long ago. Be that as it may, here are a few suggestions for you to mull over . . .

1. Don't tell anyone that you've made the transition from demo to trading a live account. If everything else is the same, i.e. the amount of time you devote to trading, then nothing will have changed as far as your family and friends are concerned.
2. Expect the best outcome - but plan for the worst. If you have another blow up - is that something you can keep to yourself so that no one else has to know about it? Needless to say, don't use savings from a joint account, mortgage money or funds put away for holidays and your children's education etc.
3. If the subject (trading) does crop up - the usual criticism of it is that it's 'just gambling' and most gamblers go broke. My advice is not to rail against this, as there's nothing you can say to convince anyone otherwise. You'll just dig yourself into an ever deepening hole. (No prizes for guessing how I know this!) However, actions speak louder than words and, if live trading mirrors the success of your demo trading (fingers crossed that it does), then you'll be in the strongest possible position. Friends and family will suddenly take a very different view about it when you start to 'splash the cash'!
4. Lastly, don't make promises in advance in case things don't pan out as planned. Keep your cards close to your chest and only discuss trading with those who seem to be genuinely interested in it and open minded about what you have to say.

Hope that helps - good luck!
Tim.

 

[tomorton]

They care, but they cannot understand what you have learned and experienced.

Nevertheless, I would suggest get back into the market asap but with minimal positions sizes. This puts a more watertight test on your revised approach, it helps build your psychological defences, but you can also truthfully say to those around that you are trading (and hopefully winning).

 

[foroom lluzers]

Last 6 months has been a bull market , anyone can make money in a bull market.
Test yourself out in choppy/ranging market , for 6 months ,before doing anything.

 

[NVP]

if your close family dont understand what you want to do and are very scared you will lose them everything (as such layperople are prone to do) you will never be happy trading .....it will affect yuor performance

I was lucky in this respect .....i was gambling from my early teens but had already spent 5 years learning in the familys bookmaking business so it was natural for me to be doing it ....with control and under their wings .......in more recent years my wife was on the trading floor at shell for 12 years so she knows what i do and lets me get on with it .........she says if people ever repossess the house she will know ive failed

Seriously though - ive known a lot of potentially good traders fail because their family are not behind them .....sorry its that simple ...it screws your head

N

 

[NVP]

Hi Jdesey,

The issue you raise does crop up from time to time - but it's usually by novices new to the game - rather than by an old hand like yourself. The point being that I would have thought you would have addressed this problem (if it is a problem) long ago. Be that as it may, here are a few suggestions for you to mull over . . .

1. Don't tell anyone that you've made the transition from demo to trading a live account. If everything else is the same, i.e. the amount of time you devote to trading, then nothing will have changed as far as your family and friends are concerned.
2. Expect the best outcome - but plan for the worst. If you have another blow up - is that something you can keep to yourself so that no one else has to know about it? Needless to say, don't use savings from a joint account, mortgage money or funds put away for holidays and your children's education etc.
3. If the subject (trading) does crop up - the usual criticism of it is that it's 'just gambling' and most gamblers go broke. My advice is not to rail against this, as there's nothing you can say to convince anyone otherwise. You'll just dig yourself into an ever deepening hole. (No prizes for guessing how I know this!) However, actions speak louder than words and, if live trading mirrors the success of your demo trading (fingers crossed that it does), then you'll be in the strongest possible position. Friends and family will suddenly take a very different view about it when you start to 'splash the cash'!
4. Lastly, don't make promises in advance in case things don't pan out as planned. Keep your cards close to your chest and only discuss trading with those who seem to be genuinely interested in it and open minded about what you have to say.

Hope that helps - good luck!
Tim.

Tell the Taxman and HMRC you are gambling

Tell your family you are trading (and share everything with them to stop them worrying.....if not dont trade )

Tell your Friends and everyone else you are semi retired and an active investor ....but nothing too serious

it saves a lot of B/**** .....unless you want people to think you are some kind of hotshot trader .......which is the path to long drawn out sh*t as insecure people try to see if they are better / smarter / richer than you etc etc ......or people try to get you to teach them how to be rich ...or just ask for money ......

N

 

[Jdesey]

All really good advice you guys. I agree that people just don't understand unless they really have studied it and made it a focus like I have. This is a long-term goal of mine and a dream and I'm not giving it up.