Best Thread Joke of the day
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Phylo
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A woman was walking her dog along the beach when she came upon a brass bottle washed up on shore.
She picked it up. She opened the top to look inside. There was a “poof” and a genie appeared before her.
“You have freed me from a thousand years being trapped in that bottle,” said the genie, “as a reward you are entitled to three wishes. What would you like me to do for you?”
She thought for a few moments.
“I would like my bank account to always have money in it. No matter what happens I can afford whatever I want.”
“Done,” said the genie, “you will always have as much money as you want, just by saying the word money.”
“Second,” said the girl, “I want my little house changed into a large mansion, with beautiful rooms and all kinds of conveniences.”
“Done,” said the genie, “your house is now a castle, with beautiful rooms, exquisite trimmings, the palace of your dreams.”
“Then, finally,” she said, “I want my precious poodle, Sir George, transformed into a handsome prince, the man of my dreams. Make him tall, handsome, sensitive, and romantic… “
“Here we go,” said the genie, and poof, the little dog was transformed into a tall, handsome man.
The genie smiled, and said “thank you again for freeing me”, and vanished.
The tall, dark, and handsome man took hold of her hand. He looked at her, and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I’m George,” he said.
Then he leaned over and whispered in her ear, “Now, aren’t you sorry you had me "fixed"?
She picked it up. She opened the top to look inside. There was a “poof” and a genie appeared before her.
“You have freed me from a thousand years being trapped in that bottle,” said the genie, “as a reward you are entitled to three wishes. What would you like me to do for you?”
She thought for a few moments.
“I would like my bank account to always have money in it. No matter what happens I can afford whatever I want.”
“Done,” said the genie, “you will always have as much money as you want, just by saying the word money.”
“Second,” said the girl, “I want my little house changed into a large mansion, with beautiful rooms and all kinds of conveniences.”
“Done,” said the genie, “your house is now a castle, with beautiful rooms, exquisite trimmings, the palace of your dreams.”
“Then, finally,” she said, “I want my precious poodle, Sir George, transformed into a handsome prince, the man of my dreams. Make him tall, handsome, sensitive, and romantic… “
“Here we go,” said the genie, and poof, the little dog was transformed into a tall, handsome man.
The genie smiled, and said “thank you again for freeing me”, and vanished.
The tall, dark, and handsome man took hold of her hand. He looked at her, and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I’m George,” he said.
Then he leaned over and whispered in her ear, “Now, aren’t you sorry you had me "fixed"?
J Livermore
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What’s worse than being raped by a Kennedy?
Being driven home afterwards.
Being driven home afterwards.
